Session 18.122

Watched M Butterfly... "Death with honor is better than life with misery." ... Hmm... thoughts to ponder on.

Swordfish, I must say, is a kick-ass movie. Totally unexpecting.That's all I've been doing. Just one movie after another after another.

I've never been here before I think. There's this state of uncertainty in a direction that I'm taking, but at the same time, it shows the promise of culminating everything that I am as a human being.

It's the stuff legends are made of, but not after I've been made a fool first. The sound of silence is the most deafening of all. The feeling of no feeling is the most painful of all. To be able to endure all is to die alive.

I suppose if you really knew where it was coming from... Well, I guess there still are great masters of the universe out there. My salutations to you all.

"Life is stranger than fiction" --- good point made in Swordfish.

I suppose we have to smile more often.

Background music: Bows. This is great stuff. You really should look for a copy of it.

There are patterns...

Session 18.333

I've been searching for her again.

Well, when it hits, you wouldn't really know what to call it. Maybe it is a big word like love.

I just wish love, peace and happiness. For all.

Session 18.798

It's been a while since I lost saw myself from within.
I think the weedy wonders do good for introspection. Looking in, I discovered that I have no more fears. I've begun to accept that whatever comes my way in this life is just something I eventually have to go through. It's easy to understand as well. You just have to let go.

I was dreaming of Grilled Prawns. You know, the really huge ones! That and some Lemon Butter Sauce. Garlic and Vinegar doesn't sound too bad either.

I realize that it's useless to try and have someone understand me. It's not that I'm unpredictable, but just because I'm polite doesn't mean that I can't be an asshole too. And just because I'm an asshole, doesn't mean that I always will be one either. We are what we are for that moment, and it's not what we are all the time.

If you can live with yourself and what you are from time to time, and remain consistent, then I suppose that's the way it should be. It makes things a little more sane. No need to keep changing masks. Well, I'm always one of two things: Stoned or sober.